Life Sucks

Ever get those feelings where you're being pulled in three, four, maybe even six different directions all at one time?! This is how I've been feeling lately. Only I'm not being pulled out in every direction, but down in every direction. I'm talking about the life stressors that have just been wearing me down! So, yes, this is another vent session. I'm giving the egos a break because of the weekend we had, and I thought they deserved an extra day to slumber. So this is just me, Becca, complaining about the suckiness I endure everyday!



#1 - I moved! And what comes with moving? Packing and unpacking, cleaning the new house, cleaning the old house, throwing away useless junk, straining back muscles, breaking things, and awkward sleeping in the new house. I hate moving even though I've moved maybe more than a dozen times in my entire life. I wish that I could just say "Oh, this is where I want to live now" snap my fingers and all my stuff is in the new house. But of course I've got my head in the clouds on that idea. What also comes with moving is showing the old house and wait forever for someone to make an offer on the damn house! Having to have the old house SPOTLESS every day because Lord knows that the buyers aren't going to buy it if my bed is unmade for one day! But we moved, and my new house is pretty dang awesome! It's an old 1940's house so just the kind I like with its creaky hardwood floors and all the nooks and crannies.



#2- Softball started on Monday. I'm the manager and I'm still sore.. How does that even work? I mean I know I was out of shape (didn't throw, catch, bat, run, etc.) but I didn't think that it would be that bad.. All I have to do is set up the cones and make-shift plates, right? Wrong. I have to catch balls being thrown in from the outfield while Coach Adams hits the girls pop flies and grounders, all while running in Crocs out in the goose-poop filled, muddy field, while the other manager is in the nice and warm gym with the other coaches! After bending over for grounders for almost two consecutive hours, my knees get sore, along with my feet who did a hell of a job running through the unstable ground in Crocs. So I go home and eat my tuna, play with my two adorable 11-week-old Shelties (Abe and Teddy), and hit the pillow at 9 o'clock! Wake up in the morning and almost cry from a killer headache and realize, I have softball right after school... Yikes!



#3- My nonexistent love life! Remember a while ago when I was venting about George? Yeah, mhm.. It's still getting me down. I broke down on Friday against the egos' and my friends' advice, and texted him, like an idiot I thought he'd text me back so we could talk about it but no, I've come to find that he's just another guy who plays games with your head. Just this morning I was having a nice conversation with two of my friends and he comes walking up and since I'm a chicken who feels embarrassed even at the sight of him I said "I gotta go" and stormed out of there faster than a Thoroughbred! Of course I deleted his number, avoid him at ALL costs and then I realize something... He is COMPLETELY unphased by it all. Like here I am completely crushed and there he is right as rain! All I have to say is this: Grrrrr! And I was sitting in the car today and "Not Meant to Be" by Theory of a Deadman, "Sorry" by Buckcherry, and "Need You Now" by Lady Antebellum came on all right in a freaking row! Like the radio was working against me, like "Haha, you're depressed about this." Boys are seriously from another planet..

#4- I'm graduating. Soon. I have to spread my wings and fly by myself out of this nest I had built with my family. I'm on my own for everything and I am terrified. I would love to know whats ahead every day, every year, I would love for everything to be predictable but it's not. Nothing is absolute in this crazy world. It's up, it's down, backwards, sideways and every which way but never straight and right infront of you. But it's not. And I'm still scared.

Anyways, I would write more but I am exhausted from this whole week. So tired that I almost fell asleep typing this! Have a good night.

Until next time
-B